I apologize for taking so long to write this part of the story, as I know that many of you have been waiting for it. When I decided to share this story via the blog, I knew that I would have to break it down into segments because of how it unfolded in time. As I have revisited this journey, I’ve remembered things that I’d forgotten, and I’ve forgotten things that happened. This part of the story, and the final piece that will follow were profound experiences for me personally and I've had to think about how to share them.
Six months after my visit to New Jersey, where I had met Joey, I was invited to a fund raising event in Malibu, California. The core members of a band from the 70’s were headlining the event that evening; two brothers who had carried the spirit of their band forward into now, which was 2007. The band was the same band that John and Joey had played with in the 70’s, and that Joey still played drums for on occasion. When I heard this, I immediately created the expectation of being able to meet these guys and share with them about John and Joey, and how John had called for Joey from the other side.
Many of my good friends were attending this event, and since at the time I was living most of my time in Kauai, I was excited to be going so that I could connect with my friends. My most long time friend, Gwen was there, and at one point we were out on the floor dancing with another friend of hers from Philadelphia, her name Sandra. Sandra was the wife of the singer in the band. After a while, the three of us found a table so that we could sit down to talk. “Have I got a story for you!” I told Sandra, and I began to tell her the story of the families in New Jersey, and how all of this had been unfolding over time. She knew all of them, and she was more than fascinated at hearing what had taken place. Granted, I didn’t give her any personal details about those readings, because I hold sacred the commitment to confidentiality. But, I did share with her that John had come through, and how he had showed me the gold record, and how he had asked for Joey. She told me that after the show was over, she wanted to take me backstage to talk with “the guys” so that I could share all of this with them.
The event that evening was very successful. The attendance was great, the music was awesome, the food was wonderful, and people were happy. At the end of the evening, as people were saying their good-byes and walking out the door, Sandra asked me to go backstage with her.
We walked into a backstage room, where all the guys from the band were moving about, packing guitars, and drums, and other equipment. The room was narrow with black couches lined against one wall, and instruments of all types lined along the wall across from the couches. Sandra introduced me to her husband, Michael and his brother Martin. She told them that they needed to listen to what I was about to tell them. So, I told them a little about how I facilitate communication for people with their loved ones on the other side. They looked at me for a second, and kept doing what they were doing. I began to share the story about John’s family, and the communication with John on the other side.
First response: they looked at me like I was nuts--totally and completely nuts. “Oh god, this isn’t going to go over well”, I thought to myself. “Oh well”, I proceeded with my story about how John had called for Joey the first time I was with the family, and how on my second visit I met Joey in person. They stopped doing what they were doing.
Michael and Martin just stood there, both of them looking at me, in total silence. I didn’t know what to think. First they acted like they were ignoring me, and now they stopped everything and there was dead silence in the room. Then they told me. They told me that Joey was dead.
Joey had died in October, and it was now February. He died six weeks after I was there with him. He died of a heart attack while was playing the drums. I was speechless. I turned my attention away from them, and searched my memory for the conversations and experiences that occurred on that night when we were all in that room at Maryann’s house—the night that Joey was there. Then I thought about all those people on the other side that had come to be with Joey, and I remembered how odd it was to me that they were to my right.
In that moment I realized that they had come to connect with him so that he would know they were there. I also realized why John had called for him to come so that he could talk with him, connect with him, open the door for him; so to speak. In those moments, as I sat there on that black vinyl couch, it was like the hundreds of pieces of a puzzle were all falling together to create a picture. And now Joey was on the other side, and I could feel him there in the room with all of us backstage.
Michael and Martin didn’t really connect with anything I was saying, or that it was possible to communicate with “the dead”. I sat there looking around the room, as they busily continued to pack their instruments. I felt as if I were on the other side looking in. I felt Joey, John, and Ralph all beside me – to my left. I looked at Sandra sitting there beside me wondering why Michael and Martin weren’t more present with what was actually happening. She was. I honestly felt in those moments that I was on the other side rather than this one. I was in awe of how this group of people; both in this world and the other, were weaving their way through time, and through the timeless, to connect with one another, and I thought about what Spencer had said to me once again, “ …there’s nowhere to go.”
Little did I know that there would be one more trip to New Jersey coming soon, and one more connection that would take place, and that experience would be by far the most heart wrenching, bitter-sweet, healing experience of all. And, remembering that experience and wondering how to write about it has had me thinking for weeks.
