Farewell Ms. Elizabeth Taylor

Dame Elizabeth Taylor

2/27/32 – 3/23/11

Dear Ms. Taylor, you were the Grand Dame of our time. You gifted us with your passion for life, your commitment to excellence in your self-expression, and your vision for humanity. Your brilliant personality was so refreshing and raw with authenticity. I am so grateful for the hours that I had the privilege to share with you on this planet, and for the creative treasures that you graced all of us with through your acting. Bless you for being, and bless you in your continued journey. Sharon Jeffers

I remember the first time I saw National Velvet. I felt as though I knew Elizabeth Taylor personally. There was something about her, her presence, and her articulate acting ability, and her welcoming appearance that struck a familiar cord in my heart. As a girl, I wished that I could meet her. That wish came true many decades later, when I least expected it, and probably had forgotten about it, until it actually happened.

I had the great good pleasure to meet the grand dame, and to spend time with her in her home. It was delightful, and when she called me a “smart ass”, I knew in that moment that she liked me, and I was right at home. I was impressed with how she put her intelligence into action when I would share something with her, she would take it to the next level. She was brilliant. That connection that I felt when I was a child watching her on the TV, it was real and right there, and when she called me a “smart ass” because of something I said, I knew in that moment that she liked me and I felt right at home.

My heart filled with delight as we interacted and carried on with what we were doing. I don’t know if I’ve ever met a more authentic individual in my life, before or since. She said exactly what she thought when she was thinking it, I could see in her eyes that her mind was lightning quick, and she had a great sense of humor. Her dedication to her work with AIDS was also more than impressive. It seemed that everything she did was filled with that passion she had for life, and her commitment to what was right before her.

When I heard of her death two days ago, I knew that she had just had her birthday. Knowing that she was born on February 27, and that she had passed on March 23, I couldn’t help but wonder what was going on in her cards. 7 weeks in the hospital means that she was admitted when she was in her 52-day. That can be a very spiritual time, and it most certainly has governance over death. That 52-days is a time for reflection.

Being born on February 27 gave Ms. Taylor a Jack of Clubs – 4 of Diamonds birthday.

I looked at her cards today. When I do this, I do it with great respect for those who have passed, and those who remain. I know what it’s like to lose a loved one, and I have great sensitivity for that. Most of the time I don’t write about these things, I just look at them to see what is there in the cards. Sensationalizing death is a no-no in my book. However, because I have a personal connection with Ms. Taylor, I’m writing as someone who got to meet and know her a bit – enough to embrace her grandness of life and her passion for living.

She had the death card at age 78, in Saturn. Saturn is our teacher, and the death card (9 of Spades) is the card of initiation.

She didn’t die until almost one month after her birthday. The 9 of Spades had now moved to determine and express the way she would leave, rather than the actual happening of dying. What I mean by that is, her death became a spiritual journey in the last few weeks – she went through a deep transformation within before she departed this world, and her outcome card for the final release was the King of Hearts – the safe harbor of love, the master of love and the supreme consciousness of the Heart.

All of this told me that she did all her work here before leaving her body. She understood so clearly her love for all she knew, and how great the love was that the world had for her.

It was certainly not a surprise to see these things in her cards, and it leaves me with tears in my eyes as I finish writing this. Our lives are so precious. Each one is grand and great. Each one of us is touch the world with who we are every moment, every day.

See you next time Grand Dame.

March 24 Queen of Clubs

Change could come abruptly or unexpectedly today, so be ready for last minute shifts in plans.

People might be a little "touchy" or extra sensitive, so be gentle and aware with interactions, including the ones you have with yourself.

The day is bringing us an opportunity to be more loving and more giving. Follow your instincts and be generous with your heart.

Balance, Beauty, and Harmony are the keywords for the day.

An overview, and return to writing my blog...

Welcome. I've not been posting on this blog for some time, and I'm now going to return to doing so. If you read A Tale of Two worlds below, please start with Part I so that it makes sense to you. Acting as a medium, I've had some extraordinary experiences, all of which I believe are important to share for many reasons.

Having lost a son, I know how devastating it can be to lose someone you love so much. In my years acting as a medium, I've seen and heard things that have brought me new insights, greater perspective, and invaluable learning relative to these lives we live, and where we go after we die. I know very little, and perhaps that is why so much does happen when those on the other side come to me to communicate with their loved ones. I have no concepts of a set way that things are. My experience has been supported over and over again with each and every person coming through from the other side being so different, and each of them revealing things that I would have no way of knowing, all of which is always confirmed by their loved ones who are still with body.

I spent a long time denying that this was real until it became so exact that I had to accept it. Not that I didn't believe there was life after death, I did, but that I was perceiving with accuracy what was actually happening. I've been seeing spirits since I was a child, and when I was little, I thought that everyone did. When I was young I would hear the thoughts of others, which I also thought was common. It wasn't long before I realized that maybe I was different from those around me - which caused me to keep things to myself for a very long time.

At this point in my life, I realized that this is where spirit has guided my work to go - into the realms of the unknown, and that which cannot be seen with the physical eyes. I have many stories to tell, each one unique, all filled with value and wisdom. Some are funny, many have great teaching, and all are heart warming.

It is very true what my son Spencer said to me when he was seven years old; that "there's nowhere to go - when people die they are still here".  As we enter this time on the planet with so many natural disasters, excessive violence, and unpredictable events, many are dying, and many are left behind. I believe that it is time that we bridge the gap between the spirit world and the physical world in our personal experiences, and I hope that the beautiful stories that I share with you here, which are a gathering of hundreds of hours of being with people on the other side as they connect with their loved ones, bring inspiration, understanding, and comfort to you.

Happy Birthday

Golden curls, ocean eyes

Gentle spirit, old and wise

A gift to me from beyond

To fill my heart 

With a song of sweet love.

The world is sleeping now.

All is stillness, soft and warm.

My heart longs to see your face

Hear your laughter

Delight in your smile.

Today is your birthday. 

And I celebrate my every moment

Knowing and loving you

Though you live now beyond the veil

You live forever in my heart and soul.

I love you and I miss you.

Mom

To Spencer -

There are moments when I forget that you're gone. Carried away by laughter, the song of a bird, the breeze dancing through my hair; lost in the moment, seduced by life; I forget. Listening to music driving in the car... working, writing, doing all the things that occupy my time...

Then I remember and time stops.

I feel and it hurts.

And I don't want to feel that hurt.
Tears roll down my face.
I know they are forms of love,
but they're not the ones I want to have right now.

They say that time heals all wounds. No it doesn't. Time teaches us to learn to live with what we've been given--experience grows around the wounds; surrounds them with other things.
Often times, beautiful things; sons and daughters, friends and lovers, laughter, love, music, beauty, and creatures. All loving, all kind, all precious.

But...you are not here. I cannot touch your face. I cannot hear your voice. I cannot see your wonderful smile and hear the laughter that made my heart dance. I cannot see you doing funny little dances like a smurf, or watch you play basketball - moving like you're seven feet tall.

Except in my mind.
I have memories.
I have beautiful memories.
Without them I would die.

I love my memories. They are wonderful. In them I can touch your face and hear your voice. In my memories I can see you smiling, and laughing, and being your wonderful you.

In my memories I can feel the joy and the love and the special moments that we shared together in this life, and I am so grateful for every one of them, and for every moment that I had with you in this physical world; from your birth to your death, and now beyond.

I miss you Spencer, and I love you, and I wish that you were here in your body.

It's almost Thanksgiving. You're not going to sit at the table. But, you are at the table in my heart every day. And I sit with you there I we reminisce.

We remember together the fun we had, and the special moments where time stood still and life seemed too good to be true, and we laugh, and we cry, and we give thanks for each other, grateful that our love is eternal and forever it shall go on.

Still, I cry my tears of sorrow and love, as that is how it is.

I am eternally grateful that you blessed me with your beautiful presence in this life.

I love you and I miss you.
Mom

A Tale of Two Worlds Part 5: A Seamless Transition

I apologize for taking so long to write this part of the story, as I know that many of you have been waiting for it. When I decided to share this story via the blog, I knew that I would have to break it down into segments because of how it unfolded in time. As I have revisited this journey, I’ve remembered things that I’d forgotten, and I’ve forgotten things that happened. This part of the story, and the final piece that will follow were profound experiences for me personally and I've had to think about how to share them.

Six months after my visit to New Jersey, where I had met Joey, I was invited to a fund raising event in Malibu, California. The core members of a band from the 70’s were headlining the event that evening; two brothers who had carried the spirit of their band forward into now, which was 2007. The band was the same band that John and Joey had played with in the 70’s, and that Joey still played drums for on occasion. When I heard this, I immediately created the expectation of being able to meet these guys and share with them about John and Joey, and how John had called for Joey from the other side.

Many of my good friends were attending this event, and since at the time I was living most of my time in Kauai, I was excited to be going so that I could connect with my friends. My most long time friend, Gwen was there, and at one point we were out on the floor dancing with another friend of hers from Philadelphia, her name Sandra. Sandra was the wife of the singer in the band. After a while, the three of us found a table so that we could sit down to talk. “Have I got a story for you!” I told Sandra, and I began to tell her the story of the families in New Jersey, and how all of this had been unfolding over time. She knew all of them, and she was more than fascinated at hearing what had taken place. Granted, I didn’t give her any personal details about those readings, because I hold sacred the commitment to confidentiality. But, I did share with her that John had come through, and how he had showed me the gold record, and how he had asked for Joey. She told me that after the show was over, she wanted to take me backstage to talk with “the guys” so that I could share all of this with them.

The event that evening was very successful. The attendance was great, the music was awesome, the food was wonderful, and people were happy. At the end of the evening, as people were saying their good-byes and walking out the door, Sandra asked me to go backstage with her.
We walked into a backstage room, where all the guys from the band were moving about, packing guitars, and drums, and other equipment. The room was narrow with black couches lined against one wall, and instruments of all types lined along the wall across from the couches. Sandra introduced me to her husband, Michael and his brother Martin. She told them that they needed to listen to what I was about to tell them. So, I told them a little about how I facilitate communication for people with their loved ones on the other side. They looked at me for a second, and kept doing what they were doing. I began to share the story about John’s family, and the communication with John on the other side.

First response: they looked at me like I was nuts--totally and completely nuts. “Oh god, this isn’t going to go over well”, I thought to myself. “Oh well”, I proceeded with my story about how John had called for Joey the first time I was with the family, and how on my second visit I met Joey in person. They stopped doing what they were doing.

Michael and Martin just stood there, both of them looking at me, in total silence. I didn’t know what to think. First they acted like they were ignoring me, and now they stopped everything and there was dead silence in the room. Then they told me. They told me that Joey was dead.

Joey had died in October, and it was now February. He died six weeks after I was there with him. He died of a heart attack while was playing the drums. I was speechless. I turned my attention away from them, and searched my memory for the conversations and experiences that occurred on that night when we were all in that room at Maryann’s house—the night that Joey was there. Then I thought about all those people on the other side that had come to be with Joey, and I remembered how odd it was to me that they were to my right.

In that moment I realized that they had come to connect with him so that he would know they were there. I also realized why John had called for him to come so that he could talk with him, connect with him, open the door for him; so to speak. In those moments, as I sat there on that black vinyl couch, it was like the hundreds of pieces of a puzzle were all falling together to create a picture. And now Joey was on the other side, and I could feel him there in the room with all of us backstage.

Michael and Martin didn’t really connect with anything I was saying, or that it was possible to communicate with “the dead”. I sat there looking around the room, as they busily continued to pack their instruments. I felt as if I were on the other side looking in. I felt Joey, John, and Ralph all beside me – to my left. I looked at Sandra sitting there beside me wondering why Michael and Martin weren’t more present with what was actually happening. She was. I honestly felt in those moments that I was on the other side rather than this one. I was in awe of how this group of people; both in this world and the other, were weaving their way through time, and through the timeless, to connect with one another, and I thought about what Spencer had said to me once again, “ …there’s nowhere to go.”

Little did I know that there would be one more trip to New Jersey coming soon, and one more connection that would take place, and that experience would be by far the most heart wrenching, bitter-sweet, healing experience of all. And, remembering that experience and wondering how to write about it has had me thinking for weeks.

A Tale of Two Worlds Part 4: We Are Here For You

It had been six months since I had been to New Jersey, and since I had talked with Jeannie and her daughters. When they heard that I was coming to town, Jeannie scheduled time for another session. This time though, we were going to Maryann’s house and her husband was going to be there, and they said that someone else would be joining us as well.

Once again it was evening when I was driven to the home of Maryann and her husband Jeff. When I walked in I was greeted with open arms, hearts, and minds. Jeannie, Maryann, and Barbara were all excited to see me, and I was very happy to see them.

It seemed that they had grown emotionally, and they appeared to be happier than when I had first met them. Being there now felt a bit like a family reunion, and there were two new people to include. Jeff was definitely skeptical; it was written all over his face. I joked with him a little bit with the hope that he would relax and see me as a normal person, and more importantly, feel comfortable with what was about to happen. I was also introduced to another man whose name was, Joey.

I do a lot of readings. I talk to a lot of people, on this side, and the other. I do not remember details unless I search for them, or I am reminded of what happened. I had totally forgotten that our last session together ended with John requesting someone named “Joey” to be present. So, when I was introduced to him, I had no conscious association—I didn’t remember that he had been called for.

We moved into the living room, which was already arranged for our evening together. The couch was huge. It was crescent shaped, it was beige, and it looked very comfortable. Maryann graciously offered me a cozy armchair that was placed facing the couch, and then they all sat down before me. I remember that moment clearly, because I noticed something very precious. They were like little children. They were innocent and eager, except for Jeff and Joey, who were a little timid now. Jeff was looking at me very intensely – I felt like he was trying to sum me up; figure out if I was a charlatan. Joey was simply curious.

I love going to New Jersey and New York. I love the people there. Joey was a New York Italian, who grew up in Queens, and he was a little edgy, very sweet, had dark pensive eyes, was quick to smile and laugh, and carried himself as if he’d been around the block several times. I like him immediately. It was one of those, “What you see is what you get” kind of feelings that I had when I looked at him. He was curious because he’d been told that John had requested his presence the next time we did this. I had not remembered that at this point, nor had anyone reminded me. So, Joey is thinking that I know who he is, and I’m clueless. This was a recipe for perfection.

First person to come through from the other side was Paul, Jeff’s dad, who had died eight months prior. I didn’t know that. Although, when I did the initial reading six months earlier, John had shown me from the other side, that they had all been to a party, and at that time when I had mentioned that he was showing me the party, they told me that it was a funeral they had recently attended. They didn’t tell me whose funeral it was.

So, here is Paul, who is Jeff’s dad, and John, Jeannie’s husband, together on the other side. Paul begins by commenting on his funeral; he mentioned two people who were there by name, and something that he found to be humorous. Unfortunately, I can’t remember right now what that was, but when that message was conveyed, Jeff was blown right out of the water. There was a part of him that looked like it was jumping off the couch and running out the front door. I had to hold my composure because the look on his face was so funny; it was hard for me not to giggle. The women were slightly entertained watching all of this because they had already been initiated by their own experiences months before, and they knew what to expect.

Suddenly, the energy shifted. I could feel a huge gathering of people to my right – people usually stand on my left. In the forefront of that group was a man with two blond women, one on each arm, and he was dangling some car keys, and focusing on Joey. Now, at this point things become more than interesting. I’m sitting in the middle of a large group of people on my right, and Paul and John on my left. Then, there’s the audience before me. I felt as if we (me and those on the other side) were all on a stage, and they (the people on the couch) were our audience. I had no idea what was going on.

The guy with the blonds; “Hey Joey, I got your keys.” He might as well have been standing right beside me because I could hear every word. It’s not always like that for me. Things usually come in pictures first. At that point I did not convey the message. John came forward and began to communicate with Joey, and it was then that I realized that this was “Joey”! “Oh, you’re Joey who John asked for” I said. “Yeah.”

Well, now I wanted to know who this person was with the two blonds and the keys, so I told him, “There’s a guy here with a blond woman on each arm and he’s holding some keys saying, “I got your keys”. Joey laughed and didn’t say anything. He looked down and began wringing his hands a bit.

I have to know what’s going on now. I’m like crazy with curiosity, and I don’t have a clue, I mean I really don’t have a clue what’s actually happening in that room. And the truth is, it would be six more months before I did.

I asked Joey who the man was and what he was talking about. Joey told us that it was Ralph, and that Ralph had stolen his car--his brand new convertible when he had first gotten it. I asked about the blonds. Again, he looked down and got a little nervous. Ralph said, “It’s okay man” so I conveyed that. Joey proceeded to tell us that Ralph had two wives, at the same time, and that Joey was the only one that knew that. This was like the otherworldly version of Days of Our Lives. It was surely one of the most bizarre experiences I have ever had as a medium. And, it was absolutely delightful – every minute of it.

As our time together continued that evening, there were insights, tears, and laughter. Secrets were shared, things previously unknown were revealed, and Joey was set free from his responsibility as the keeper of the secrets. When the evening ended, I was filled to the brim with love, and I believe that was true for everyone who was there—on this side and the other.

It would be six months later, at a fundraiser in Southern California that I would unexpectedly meet other people connected to this group of family and friends, and the other members of the band that they had all been in together in the 1970’s. And those band members would have a message for me.